Marketing: Part 1 of 2 -
Compiling your Curriculum Vitae
CV’s are confusing
creatures as you find yourself trying to cram 23 years worth of activity and
experience onto 2 A4 sheets of paper. This info should be concise-yet
descriptive, it should be well formatted and punctuated properly as "first impressions count". I addition to this you CV should be worded well to reflect what a well-rounded and generally
spectacular human being you are without turning it into a 5 page essay with
unnecessary info, illusions and exaggerations. Once you successfully squish
your life story on a postage stamp you can move to The Hunt-the second step in
the process.
Your CV-basically your life story on a postage stamp |
The Hunt:
The Hunt is pretty straight
forward-log on the internet, phone a friend or pick up The Classifieds and search
for an advert that has not yet expired. Find a post in the region of your
choice and in your area of interest and get your CV out there. Then you wait
with baited breath for a response. There are 3 possible responses with associated emotions:
Response A: No
Associated Emotion:
i) Despair, denial, depressed, distressed. May be associated with some degree
of confusion
ii) Indifferent
Response B: Pending
No response-thus assume “no” until stated
otherwise.
Associated Emotion:
One may find one’s self in a vortex of
emotion.
Characteristics:
Wide set eyes indicating silent confusion and inner turmoil.
May ask soul searching questions like “Did my awesome-ness stun them
to silence? Or did they find my font offensive?”
Response C: Yes
Associated Emotion:
Pride, joy, hope, general happiness
and optimism
Characteristics:
Individual may enter Eager Beaver mode (EBM)
EBM Features:
Bright eyes + bushy tail = Optimism
Buck teeth = Devour academic material
Pin on beaver ears = The job hunt equivalent of "Big Girl Panties" / war paint
Employer's Response and Associated Emotions |
Marketing: Part 2 of 2 –
The Interview (AKA The Response to the Response)
Since living in the bush
the whole interview process has somewhat changed for me. I have gone from the
familiar face-to-face interview to the newly acquainted telephonic one. In my
youth interviews were chilled. You sit in a waiting room, get summoned and do
your thing. Shake hands, answer some questions and if you manage to muster
enough courage and wit you may find the time crack a few jokes in between. I
find face-to-face interviews to be fun and somewhat interesting; telephonic
interviews on the other hand have become the stun gun of my existence. When
asked questions I find myself having multiple outer body experiences. I feel my
brain constructing coherent sentences that aim to reflect my years of experience,
my wealth of knowledge and logical thought process. My tongue on the other hand
seems to feel that telephonic interviews are the perfect opportunity to
practise its free styling and improvisation skills.
Figure 1: The Dream - How I would like to sound: Calm, cool and collected-basically unleash my inner genius Figure 2: Reality - My interpretation of the "Outer Body Experience" |
This outer body experience is not a new phenomena, I was first introduced to it as a student during my practical exam discussion. During the discussion lecturer had the opportunity question my treatment and evaluation choices to test my clinical reasoning. As a student these outer body experiences happened in a controlled environment. My examiners had supervised me for the whole block, thus knew that my nerves were the source of this phenomena. Potential employers on the other hand do not have this inside information.
Outer Body Experience at undergraduate level |
Not knowing what 2013 holds may be frustrating and worrying at times, but I take comfort in knowing that where ever I am is precisely where God wants me to be.
Note to all potential employers: Just pick me! |